Mental Condition: Pessimistic

Being in a new working environment really drive me crazy. I miss my old place and my old colleague.
I find out that, the more I get older the more pessimistic I am. I always only expect the bad or the worst that could happen to me. I will not believe that good thing will happen to me.

I cannot stand anybody that speak bad remarks or bad comment on anything I do.

I need to find peace with myself, to have more confident and to find an angel in each person eyes.

Suddenly I realize that my current mental condition is not suitable for me to have a boyfriend. Even if someone nice standing in front of me, I will not believe that a human being will come to like me. I will think of all the evil thought he might have, and will not believe that such good thing will happen to me.

Actually what my ex-boss said is true. He called me before I just about to start my current job. He said why not came back to work for him, why work for a new company with new environment. He said you need to adapt to the environment , which is whole lot of work.

I began find peace with loneliness. I am more relax with myself. I can do or go whatever I want. But sometimes I do need a friend beside me.